I Might Have to Go...

My heart's hurting for Kenya... it seems so wrong not to stand beside them in their time of pain, violence and chaos... I might have to go- sooner, instead of later. Our group was to leave Tuesday morning, Jan 15... but with the violence and chaos since the elections, it only seemed prudent to cancel the trip. Don't think I could handle watching our group caught up in the middle of another nations anger over political and social issues I don't begin to understand.

"prudent..."

But my heart remains so full... praying for a solution... don't even know what I'd do if I went. Guess part of me just wants to hold my friends, embrace our young work, tell people how sorry we are... let them know that we're not just friends from afar and we'll visit when everything's good... but to show them we're willing and ready to enter their pain, their heartbreak, their chaos... I don't begin to know how to express it.

Matatu's- that's one in the picture. They're little minivans, one of Kenya's major forms of mass transit, that get jammed with people- often until they're hanging out the doors. We jammed that little matatu to make are way outside Kakuma, a refugee camp near the boarder with Sudan in NW Kenya. People begged for rescue, greeted us in love, pressed names written on paper into our hands, told us stories of loss that were beyond grief or understanding. Then we jammed back into our little matatu- windows closed against the dust of the Sahara Desert- even in the 122 degree (farenheit) heat... you've not lived until you're jammed into a matatu at plus 120!

It begs the question: "Why would ANYONE want to go back!?!"

A popular saying when we were in Kenya was "It's easier to get a visa into Heaven than into the United States." The popular saying now- after the elections -is "It's easier for a Luo to become president of the US, (that would be Barack Obama), then to become president of Kenya!" Poverty soon becomes futility. We wanted desperately for a Maasai pastor we work with to visit us here in the US. He received his passport in Kenya only to be denied a visa by the US. Devestated- he emailed me -"What am I to do now?"

I know what he did: got back into a matatu- paid his schillings and headed towards his home outside Narok. Walked the long single track path alone to his little manata and passed the news along to his family- walked the 120 kilometers he walks every week through the wilderness of the Masai Mara visiting the 4 churches he pastors and gave them the sad news... they'd been praying. Maybe I just need to hug Pastor Samuel and tell him we're disappointed too... but sitting in my office, that could hold several matatus, that Samuel's entire home would fit neatly within... the "prudent" thing to do, that which I'll probably do... is to stay... until I know how I can help.

God's Grace is Amazing. It's not abandoned the people of Kenya, the people of the US, or anyone anywhere... it flows in and through us... filling us richly with His Healing Power, even when we're not sure what to do. Until then, I long to be "faithful in the meantime." It's my prayer for you as well. I'm guessing you have places to go.

blessings,

Eric